A ESL Teacher's Poem....

Funny Poem for ESL Teachers!

I found this poem while working as an ESL teacher in Asia, and it pretty much encompasses all the frustrations of my students in their endevours to understand English. In any case, I found it pretty amusing...



English Is a Stupid Language
Anonymous

There is no egg in eggplant,
No ham in the hamburger,
And neither pine, nor apple,
In our dear pineapple

English Muffins were not invented in England,
And French Fries do not hail from France.
And while quicksand takes you down slowly,
Why do boxers, in boxing rings, dance?

If writers write, how come fingers don’t fing?
If the plural of tooth is teeth,
Why aren’t phone booths called phone beeth?
If a teacher taught, why didn’t the preacher praught?

If a Vegetarian eats vegetables,
What does a humanitarian eat?
And why do we recite at a play,
When a play has a recital?

And why do we park on our driveways,
and drive on our Parkways?
And, in being of the human race,
we find that it isn’t even a race at all.

You have to marvel, that a house burns up,
while it actually burns down.
And when the stars are out they are visible
While when the lights are out they are invisible,

Yes, English is a stupid language,
Which makes not much sense at all,
And that is why, when I wind up my watch, it starts.
But when I wind up this poem, it ends.

The End

Hope you enjoy it as much as I did!